To the, “Marijuana Anonymous” Members from Salem, Oregon, That Were Profiled on the Five O’clock News

Sack up, you fucking pussies.  Why is your group comprised solely of twenty-eight-year-old white boys?

Yes, I’m laughing at you, even the bitches and their ugly ass friends are laughin’ at cha.  And for giving me such a chuckle, I’ll impart some wisdom on ya that I heard from an older soul, he was a fifteen-year-old chronic, crack smokin’ hooker with AIDS, from Las Vegas.

The nigga’ said, “when was the last time you had to suck a dick for weed: bitch.”  I loved the kid.

You’re doing a grave disservice to junkies everywhere.  You’re merely weak minded individuals that need direction.  Get right with yourselves; you’ll be okay.

Insert emoji here of the last dude that died from a THC overdose.  He might look something like… well, we don’t know now, do we.

Whitey C. Blackwell